Degrees of Connection

We’ve learned a few things this year:  how flexible we can be;  how quickly life can change, how hard distanced learning is….  One of the biggest lessons the universe has been trying to teach us is that we are all linked with one another in a vast network.  Not one of us lies outside that network.  Said another way - there is no human being (or animal, really) to whom we are not connected.  This means that, like it or not, we are as connected to that person whose behavior/views/lifestyle we don’t like as we are to someone we cherish, respect, appreciate.  

The virus has driven that point home:  our impact on others extends far beyond our immediate circle and others’ impact on us can come from one degree of separation, or six degrees, or 30 degrees. 

So what if we visualize all of the connections between us and others and infused each and every one of those connections with goodwill?  The New York Times recently ran an article about Professor Loretta J. Ross at Smith College and how she is inviting the students to consider “calling in” when they take issue with something someone has said or done, instead of calling them out publicly.  "Calling in", in her view, invites dialogue and learning, openness and vulnerability and is the opposite of the public shaming that is taking place.  It’s a private conversation inflected with curiosity.  This speaks to me. 

It’s helpful, too, to remember that areas of the brain necessary for learning shut down when we experience shame (thank you Brene Brown for all the research you’ve done around this!).

So instead of cancelling, or cutting off, we nurture connection, we lean in, we turn toward, we listen and we speak. 

Infusing each and every connection with goodwill takes practice, a sense of being safe enough to allow ourselves to be vulnerable, and a willingness to make mistakes and say the wrong thing.  When we practice Loving Kindness meditation, Equanimity, Gratitude and Self-Compassion we resource ourselves to collaborate, learn and grow, and to feed goodwill into the vast network we all share.

We hope you will join us. 

May there be peace on Earth and goodwill toward all,

Your CMP Family