You Are Not Stuck

More than a few times recently I’ve heard someone say, “At least it’s the end of winter so we know spring will come soon,” followed by the observation that knowing the weather will change makes even the most challenging weather more tolerable.

One of the benefits of meditation and mindfulness is that they train us to pay attention. And one of the truths that becomes super evident when we pay attention is that everything is constantly changing. In effect, we’re allowing observation (of what is actually happening) to override thoughts (about what might happen) and assumption (that what is happening now is going to keep happening).

I got to witness this first-hand the other day when I was experiencing pain. In my mind, the pain was a solid block, uniform in its intensity and location. It felt immutable. When I began to pay real, close attention to it, I was amazed at how it waxed and waned, and shifted from one location to another. It reminded me of the story of how Jon Kabat-Zinn became inspired to use mindfulness to treat chronic pain. As I recall the story, he was on a ten-day retreat in which he needed to sit very still for long stretches of time. At times this caused him extreme discomfort, especially in his knees. Initially he believed he would need to move in order to alleviate the pain - that he couldn’t sit still. I can imagine his experience, the mind telling him, “This is impossible for you. You can’t do this,” and the time he likely took to debate his options in his mind, and build ever-more convincing stories around what was going to happen.

At one point, he turned his attention away from the thoughts, and directed it straight at the point where he was feeling pain. As he shined the spotlight of awareness on the pain itself, he saw it more clearly - saw that it wasn’t one whole block, but rather a shifting collection of physical experiences. Once he realized this, it became eminently more tolerable and he was able to sit with it and last the duration of the retreat. The pain didn’t go away - his relationship to the pain shifted.

This shift in relationship is equally compellingly articulated by Shauna Shapiro in her wonderful book, Good Morning I Love You, where she recounts her own journey through pain and how she came to realize that “The part of you that knows you are in pain is not in pain.”

So by training ourselves to pay attention - not just to the beautiful, wondrous parts of life, but to ALL of life, including the parts we’d rather not experience - we come to understand that “this too shall pass” and that even in this exact moment, “this is a part of my experience, but not all of my experience”.

What does this really do? As always, the invitation is for you to take it for a test drive. Inviting you, right now, to close the eyes, take a nice deep, slow breath, and allow yourself to hear the words, “I am not stuck.” Rest into them, allow them to sink in, open to them. Repeat for a few rounds of breath. Maybe nothing at all happens, or maybe there is a palpable shift, a loosening.

We hope that you will join us this week for one of the ten live meditation sessions offered, where we can practice paying close attention.

May all beings, without exception, know that we are not stuck.

With love,
Your CMP family